I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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