He is such a slut. More and more my type.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
