LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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