One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
