You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Edward fifth and chaser hands
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
