Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize