im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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