This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I came so hard my ears popped.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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