i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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