Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off