I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I just googled if crying burns calories
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
