Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
