PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
