i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
