tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Randomize