Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
