She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I CAN MOONWALK!
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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