Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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