I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
should my penis look like a turkey
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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