I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize