Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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