As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is Oprah even human
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize