I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
