she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize