i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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