Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
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He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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