never play flip cup with pint glasses
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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