none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
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My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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