At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
