to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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