i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
