sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
