He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
it hurts more in the daytime
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
