he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
