either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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