actually, I'm a sock model
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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