She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We left the knife in your bed.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize
