Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
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let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
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The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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