The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I deserve this hangover.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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