this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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