Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
