i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
you never un-have a 4some
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
