and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
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That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
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Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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