Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize
