So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
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