Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
