She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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