i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize