all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Randomize
