The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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