this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
sex in a hospital.. check
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
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