I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
